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July 01, 2006
day 7
June 30, 2006
day 6
June 29, 2006
day 5
June 28, 2006
day 4
June 27, 2006
day 3

I am toooooo tired. I really do not think I can handle being up so late anymore. Going to bed at 3 AM is just not working.

So here's the deal. I ranted yesterday about Jim's email that he sent me. I started thinking about it and decided I should edit that entry and take out what I said. Once it was off my chest I felt better.

But then I forgot.

He came online and said he was going to go read my journal. I was like, ooops. I raced to log in and edit the entry, but it was too late. He had already read it.

Oh well.

David keeps calling me. As if to prove my theory about him, the more I ignore his calls the more he calls me. It's been 3 days since we talked and he has called at least 5 times, he has left 3 long messages. It's interesting to me. Here is a guy that once upon a time I cared about, but he could not care back, and now its the reverse? When we talked this weekend I told him all about Jim. Jim is pretty much the antithesis of him.

I never told him how all the things he ruined. Like how I have really lost my ability to trust. How my radar is always going, because it just hurt too much to lose to another woman. I have dated 5 other guys kinda seriously, and I lost three of them to other women. But with David it was bad. Really bad. He made cheating an art form. I don't even think it mattered who the girls were. There were girls online, girls who were 14 (he was 18) he had girls strung along from coast to coast.

It's revolting when I think of it now. The whole relationship was a scam. He knew his friend liked me, and he did not want his friend to have me. It became a challenge to him...once the challenge wore off, he moved on...he just neglected to let me know.

So this time, it's payback. I am stringing HIM along. It's wonderful to hear the loneliness in his voice. He sounds so confused as he wonders on my machine why I will not pick up the phone, why I won't return his calls. It feels so good.

My office is having a BBQ on Thursday. I do not care much to go, except I think I will be paid to go, which is really good. I have never really hated my job before, and its a weird feeling. It's just so monotonous and they really seem to think that I am coming back in the fall. Yeah right. Definitely not happening.

Well, I must go take my shower and get ready for the day. Before you know it, I will be back.

I promise I will find something more interesting to talk about....

Next time on "A Life In Progress" Jenn discusses Episode two of the Real World

Listening to: "Gotta Man" Eve

Before - After