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July 01, 2006
day 7
June 30, 2006
day 6
June 29, 2006
day 5
June 28, 2006
day 4
June 27, 2006
day 3

"You will never know love unless you surrender to it." -Fools Rush In

Well, the first Jim-less week has passed. What have I done? Well, I spent most of my time working. That was fun because it distracted me a lot. Kept me from totally breaking down. When I would get home it would be so quiet and lonely...quite a contrast from my bustling classroom.

This weekend I really did not do much. I never made it to the store. It rained so much I did not want to go out. I managed to get a bit of cleaning done. I could not do the laundry as I wanted to because I just got a new laundry card but alas, there is no money on it. =(

I read a little. The book I was reading was too boring. I spent way too many hours either watching Lifetime or playing with my cliques. I spent like 3 hours looking for cliques to join. You have to go check them out! Already one of them is not working right...I am so bummed.

So now that I made it over this hurdle I have to get back on the ball. This whole being a couch/'net potato is not cool.

My friend V (which is really what I call her, it's not a thing to protect the innocent) is coming back on Monday night, and we are going to go to the grocery store on Tuesday after work. It seems sad that one would be so excited about grocery shopping but I am just happy to spend time with "grown ups" Sure I work with adults during the day, but my contact with them is quite limited, Besides, it is not like we can really hang out and chat anyway. It will be nice to talk about something other than discipline problems and lesson plans.

I was watching Fools Rush In today. I love that movie. I always thought the main characters were like me and Jim...one night stand aside. =)

It's kinda sad because I love Arizona so much and he is so enamored with New England. I really hate snow. But when it comes to him it does not matter. I guess I could live with snow as long as it means living with him.

I have also been spending some time researching the grad schools I would like to apply to. I really had my heart set on ASU, but I figured it may not be practical to just apply to one school so I went to some sites to research some schools. I now have a list of 14 schools:

UNH

UConn

Michigan State

Syracuse

University of Memphis

University of Hawaii - Manoa

University of Florida

UNC Chapel Hill

University of Maryland College Park

University of Georgia

UVA - Curry

University of Arizona

ASU

Obviously I am not going to apply to all of them. Hopefully I can visit a few and narrow my list. There are a few I feel very strongly about, the others have good reputations and the cost is good. Oh well, I will keep ya updated.

Sometimes I feel like I don't even want to go to grad school anymore. I mean, I certainly want to become a teacher, but I don't feel very happy without Jim here.

He might say otherwise sometimes but we support each other, and it would not be the same without him. Certainly there would be times when I would question some of the things he would do. But it was only because I saw all the stress it was putting on him. His last year here he was working a few hours a week, going to classes, working on a student newspaper, and he was an officer in two organizations. Meanwhile on the side he was working on the yearly concert our campus holds. I mean, come on. That's a lot. But I always tried to support him. Making sure he had the things he needed for classes like notes and books and reminding him of when papers and exams were. We have always had at least one class together and he always said he did better when we had a class together. But back to the support thing, it's like we are a team. I feel I work better as part of this team. I feel stronger, I definitely feel happier. I feel like a better person.

Now that he's gone, I feel we aren't a team anymore. Even little things are tough. When I go to make dinner it is hard to think of what to make. I am used to asking him or thinking what he might want. When I went to our favorite restaurant this week it sucked. Everything seems better when he is around.

Two years ago, when he left for the summer the weather was almost as bad as it is now. He really is like a ray of sunshine.

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Ok, before I really depress myself I am going to change topics.

Before - After